His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
he told me I talked like a deaf person
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
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