weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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