Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
