i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
