Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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