I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
