She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize