i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
