Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize