Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
