im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
