Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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