We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
