I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
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