your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
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