nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
