I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
