if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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