Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
