Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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