I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I believe in your delicious
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Please don't give away my fajitas
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