Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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