this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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