I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
