Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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