I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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