cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Randomize
