There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize