my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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