Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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