Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
