he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize