at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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