Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
