Porn is love you can see.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
