You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
