If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
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