please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
