Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
