Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
