apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
