nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Randomize
