From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
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