i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
