Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
