i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize