i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
