Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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