I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
