They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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