Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
