I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
